Jan 26, 2014

Runway to Reality - Spring 2014 Trends

I realize that I just did a post about winter 2014 trends last week and I also realize that the forecast is still pretty arctic in the northeast and midwest, as it will remain for a few more months.

But I'm from North Carolina. We wear flip flops and mini-skirts by Valentine's Day, so spring fashion is already relevant.

For those in warm climates, here's my take on what to wear and what to avoid from the spring '14 runway.

Hit: Pastels.

Costello Tagliapietra, Spring '14
Just try not to look like an Easter egg, 'mkay? It's easy to go Sunday-best-overboard in pastels, so I recommend leaving pastels for the floaty spring dresses and chic little ensembles, not pantsuits. That only works on Costello Tagliapietra's runway and in Willy Wonka's candy factory around the end of Lent.

Ish: Wide Leg Trousers.

Let's be honest - unless you have forty-four inch legs (points for reference) wide leg trousers aren't particularly flattering. You might thing that the looseness would make them more forgiving than the ever-tighter skinny jeans.

When Chanel tried it in 2011 - it didn't work then, it still doesn't work now. And Chanel can barely do any wrong (other than that hideodorous blouse) so...
Glamour called this a wearable trend?

HA.

You're wrong, my friend. Any normal person in these pants is going to look like you're trying to smuggle bread to a no-feeding-the-ducks park. I don't care if Michael Kors, Stella McCartney, BCBG, or even the Pope himself are doing it. PASS - like crosstotheothersideofthestreetandpass pass.

The only reason that this is an 'ish' and not a 'miss' is that I'm hoping it's an indicator of a more leg-friendly fashion future - a future in with a woman's legs can neither drown in material nor risk health issues from cut off circulation.

Miss: Tea-length skirts.

How could it get any worse than wide leg trousers?

Well, when you decide to draw fashion inspiration from Steve Urkel's twin sister, you're heading in the right direction.

WHAT. ON. EARTH.


Who decided that making skirts high-rise would be a nice idea? And what were they smoking? Because high rise pants just aren't tragic enough, let's let it happen to skirts.

Please, PLEASE either choose a long skirt, a knee length skirt, or a mini skirt. Anything, but don't decide to be indecisive and go for the in-between skirt - it doesn't work like that!

I'm going to go try to un-see that fashion atrocity by sighing over Vera Wang's latest work.

Do you follow trends?

What's your least favorite trend of the last five years?

What's your favorite skirt length?

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