Apr 16, 2015

"If You're Not Rich, Be Attractive"

Let's face it - we all get a lot of advice, solicited and not so much, all the time. And some of that advice? Well, it's just straight-up shitty.


But here's the thing about shitty advice: sometimes there's a nugget of gold hidden in all that sooty black coal. 

I realized a while ago when, at a fashion show after-party, a man gave me this post's title as advice. He was (a) rich, (b) proud of it, and (c) not on my potential friends list. Pair all  of that with the fact that he followed that golden advice up with a leering "you're doing it right" and my immediate reaction wasn't gratitude for the golden advice.

I don't like you

Instead, it was a superficially polite smile and an internal 'please excuse me while I find an appropriate receptacle to hurl in.'

But a few days later, when I thought about what I must assume was a failed attempt at flirting, I realized that there was a bit of a point in there.
If you haven't (yet) achieved the success that you desire, whether it's professionally, academically, romantically, or in any other way, it can be helpful to focus less on the end result and more on making yourself the kind of person who attracts that end result. 

Do you want more professional success? Work hard, work smart, smile a lot, and be a 'yes-(wo)man' both as far as work and as networking goes.


Do you want more academic success? Instead of bemoaning your current grades, but continuing patterns of procrastination or short-term pre-exam cramming, be a voracious learner each and every day. Learn things that go beyond the study guide. Go to office hours. Volunteer for, and fastidiously attend, study groups. Consciously reignite your love of learning.

Are you single and don't want to be? While being single is wonderful, a good relationship can be incredible and I can completely understand the desire to be in one.

image
But the key there is a good relationship, not just a relationship. A bad, or even an okay, relationship is much less desirable than being single. 

Instead of being bummed about the relationship you don't have, and grasping at straws to make it happen, be the kind of person that you would want to date. Be kind to everyone, so that it becomes a habit, and improve your personal life. Work on your solitary happiness, because a relationship won't make you happy but happiness will help make you a better partner. Before you know it, you'll have what you wanted - or you'll be single longer, but happy about it!

 yAY!!! -  yAY!!!  Happy Weasel Seal

Seriously, the amount of time you have when you're single is amazing. I love it.

But most importantly, this advice applies to life over all. Is your life not quite what you want it to be? Do you go on Instagram and fantasize over the life of your favorite InstaCeleb? Instead of coveting what they have, which only adds to your dissatisfaction with your life, think about what it is that makes what they have nice. Are they happy, healthy, and travel a lot? Be inspired by them!

You can easily take steps to improving your health and choosing to be happy! Constant travel is difficult without a big budget, but you would be surprised by how much 'travel' can be done in your own home town! Try out a new cafe, meet some new people, join a MeetUp group, spend a day tanning (if it's warm enough and you're properly SPF-protected) in your local park.

Make the most of your life and create the lifestyle you want to live! You can do it.

What's some bad advice that you got that turned out to be pretty solid?

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